More on Martial Arts...

Here are some new pics from last week's martial arts class. Mr. Nathan is an extremely patient teacher and said Collin could participate if he wanted to. Enjoy!

Pretty Emmaline!


Noah and Collin stretching.


The workout begins!

Noah!!

Noah took this pic all by himself.

Noah, about 5 minutes after being removed from Chick Fa La for an altercation with another child, said to me,"Mommy I am really glad God 'teached' me a lesson tonight. I asked him what he learned. He said "ya know, how to be a really good dolphin". And I thought he was going to have a moment of deep spiritual clarity.;)

Tag...

My friend Jen, tagged me to post the 4th picture from my 4th blog post. These pics wouldn't separate for some reason, so here are 3. They are from spring 2007. Good memories.
So, now I have to tag 4 friends. Erin Johnson, Erin Chase, Erika Lindsey and Susan Galvin, it's your turn!! Have fun!

life

I am just sitting here, watching the boys play together. Currently, Collin is the patient and Noah is the doctor. Noah sporting a hospital green lab coat, doctor's kit in hand, and Collin covered in a warm fleece. The boys love their doctor's kit. The love to switch roles back and forth. They love to diagnose and treat the various made up ailments they suffer from. I lovingly watch them with a thankful heart, humbled by the thought that less than 8 months ago I almost died. I know if I would have died, I would now be resting in my Savior's loving arms, not longing for things of this earth, but my precious children would face a MUCH harsher reality... life without Mommy. I can't help but think about it. I am surprised at how often that thought creeps into my brain. I know full well that if that had been God's plan for my life, their life, it would have been made perfect, but it still weighs heavy on my heart.
I have been working so hard at not letting the tears fall I am exhausted. I am still trying to come to terms with the fact that I almost died. Last night I was experiencing pain in my urerter. Yes, I know where my urerter is and can identify when pain comes from there. Trust me it is as much fun as it sounds. It seems I am constantly reminded of the pain of the last year: physical, emotional and spiritual. I wonder if I have really even started healing. I don't know why I can't deal with it, but I really feel like I can't right now. Does that even make sense?
So, for today, I sit in the beauty of all that God has given me. All of the joy and all of the pain. All of the easy times and the times of amazing trials. I think about how healthy my boys are. I am thankful they are both healthy! SO VERY THANKFUL! No special dietary needs, no "special" education needs. Normal development, normal health, so often taken for granted, so underappreciated.

A new experience for me...

So I thought I would take a minute to share my new experience with you. For a while, as long as I have known him, Aaron has wanted to go to the shooting range and, well, shoot guns of course. Well, that's just what we did last night. I can sum up the whole experience in one word, TERRIFYING! I thought I would go in there, face my fear of holding a gun and then move on to the part where it gets exciting. I was terrified. When you walk into the place, you are surrounded by guns, holster's, ammo and even some knives. I kept thinking, 'oh crap! I wonder if anyone would notice if I left'. Let me set the scene. First you go and give your ID to the woman that gives you paperwork to fill out. Scratch that, first, I went to the bathroom. I thought I was going to pee my pants. ;) Then, you sign a paper about "what the heck you do with a gun so you don't kill or harm anyone" and then another paper with a lot of words. You go to the counter, purchase your targets, ammo and borrow ear protectors and safety goggles. So yes, you look amazing! :) The first time I heard one of the guns fire I wanted to hit the deck and it wasn't even in the same room as we were in. Thankfully our friends, J and L know about guns and they were kind enough to go with us (Aaron, his brother Joshua and myself), bring their gun(s) and show us the ropes. J took care of teaching Aaron and Joshua, so I had one-on-one instruction from a VERY patient L. I think I shot 4 different types of guns, maybe 5. It was shocking to me that each gun felt so different. I thought I would go in there, shoot a couple shots and then feel better about it and become my normal competitive self. WRONG! Dude, you could kill someone with this thing. That never left my mind. I was shaking after every bullet left the chamber. I found it strangely fun to load the bullets, but that kind of hurt. I think if you do it a lot you would develop callouses on both of your thumbs. When it was over, I was relieved. I was happy to have had the experience, but I really don't want to EVER do that again.
I do want to say something on the whole issue of guns, I have a great respect for people who go through the training and learn to use the guns safely and wisely. There is so much that goes with shooting, I had no idea. If you think you are going to walk into a shooting range, hold the gun with one hand, on it's side - gangsta style, let me tell you, YOU ARE SO WRONG. It is hard to remember all of the things you have to do while holding and loading a gun it is crazy. I did hit the target a few times, but it wasn't "exciting" like I thought it would be.
In closing, I want to encourage you to find something new, that you may be slightly afraid of and try it. It is good to try new things at every age. Who knows, you may find a new hobby. I didn't find my new hobby, but I did find out that I can face fears and learn from them which causes growth and helps you deal with some things. So overall, I am glad I did it.